My take on Michelle Obama's documentary "Becoming"​

What I absolutely loved about Michelle Obama’s documentary “Becoming” is the emphasis she put on becoming herself. Especially about being an equal to her partner Barack Obama long before he became the president of the United States of America. The documentary is neatly focussed on her personal story centered around finding her identity in the most original form. Without frills and grandeur.

Her version of standing up for herself inspires me greatly not to feel guilty about putting myself first. Something that women have been criticized for, in many cultures in domestic and corporate scenarios.

To me, she’s not a woman who is just a voice for women’s rights or feminism but a woman who claims her place with confidence next to her partner. A very insightful story she shared in the documentary is how when she and Barack were new parents to their child, Barack put himself first and found time to go to the gym. I am amazed at her profound response to that. She said that instead of calling out on him for prioritising his gym workout over taking care of their child, she thought she needed to figure out how to get herself to the gym!

She mentioned that having Barak in her life as a partner was like a tsunami and she would have been swept away if she didn’t step up. At this point in her life, she already was a Princeton graduate and a lawyer. To come to accept that you need to step up your game is ripping off the ego and facing your vulnerability. The opposite of what people usually do in this scenario - play the blame game, defend or victimise themselves.

This touches me personally as I was in this exact position. Kind and pure-hearted as I can be, I was faced with a strongly opinionated man for a romantic interest. I know exactly what she means here because I did get swept away like a tsunami with this encounter as I barely noticed what hit me. Time and circumstances made the situation worse. Now as I look back on the stepping up I had to do within myself, I get her message.

As a woman, I have been brought up in my culture to be submissive and suffering. To sacrifice my choices for the good of my children or those around me. That’s the narrative for women in most parts of the world. However, after living in a foreign culture and especially having a close encounter with an individual that prioritises his personal space to a huge extent, I've been able to see how much I needed to claim my own space. Space is not something that’s even discussed in my culture, let alone prioritising it!

It can be tough as two individuals try to be in companionship with each other given the different backgrounds two people come from. My experience has made me choose to claim myself. Become me. To be aware consciously that no one’s looking out for me if I don't look out for myself first.

I highly recommend women to watch this documentary. I urge women of all cultures to look within themselves and see how they can step up and become themselves. The focus being on not trying to be as good as or to be somebody else, but be YOU and be the best version of that!